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I have been dating a guy I met online for about 3 months now. My boyfriend has many good qualities, and I really like him a lot (I’m starting to love him).

She was free to do the same, except she didn’t want to.

This leads to distancing, constant doubts, and fear of abandonment that comes with assuming people can’t be trusted or trusting too soon.

Building high walls because some people violated your trust in the past isn’t fair to those perfectly trustworthy people you’re just getting to know. One of the problems I’ve figured out about myself is that my gut gave me signs not to trust certain people, and I ignored it.

Maybe you were cheated on, lied to, ghosted, and completely betrayed.

It makes sense that you’ve had high walls after that.

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Pros: It means women have an extra barrier against the 'hey hun wanna fuk?? It also means if she's got in touch with you, you definitely weren't an 'accidental swipe', meaning you'll be leaving less of those unanswered hellos that slowly chip away at your soul. Though one minor gripe is that Bumble's algorithm clearly pulls ten of the highest rated profiles to the top of your feed every time you log in.

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