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Remember: Tending to your wounds is a crucial step in restoring confidence, but it’s not an end in and of itself.

Ignoring a blow to your confidence is just as dangerous as overindulging in self pity.

And refusing to quit while celebrating small wins feeds the life experience that underlies true and lasting confidence.

This constellation of capabilities — attitude, knowledge, and experience, which together make up AOC’s CAKE formula — is the formula for true and sustainable confidence. It’s astounding how much the outer can affect the inner, how much behavior can affect your thoughts. A study from Harvard, published in Psychological Science, shows that body language can influence how confident you feel, as Amy Cuddy highlights in this TED talk.

Journaling also creates a record of your growth for you to revisit, so you can track your wins along the way.

Understanding how to restore confidence when it dips is an essential skill, and it depends on three core components: attitude, knowledge and experience.

By working within those three domains, we can learn to rebuild and sustain confidence through its natural ebbs and flow.

In an old piece, he writes openly about working amidst his despair over a particularly heavy book project: My solution? And that’s what restoring confidence looks like in action.

True confidence isn’t about suppressing pain or pretending that failure doesn’t hurt.




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The problem with the worship of the alpha male starts with the current fad of explaining male and female sexual behaviors via evolutionary psychology and involves two disparite beliefs.


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